The Sacramento Kings, Sacramento’s claim to NBA fame, were doing well during the mid season and I was transfixed on the game as the phone rang.
“Mr. Young? I’m Dave Swingle from Maita Toyota, has your wife arrived at home yet?”
“Yes” I answered for she had just come in and sat with me to watch the game.
“Well,” he continued, “she has taken the wrong car and hers is still here at the dealership.”
This is just another of the delightful “mistakes” that my dear Angie was so often committing.
“Really?”, I asked,
“Yes” he replied, “and the new owner of the car she took is very upset. They had just purchased it and were coming to the service bay to pick it up when your wife drove off in it.”
“Well,” I replied,” my wife is a blond.”
This seemed to be a sufficient reply as I heard him repeat it to a group that was apparently gathered around him and I could hear their laughter in response.
“Could you please bring it back?” he asked.
“I’ll be right there” I replied.
Angie has been doing this sort of thing for all of the forty plus years of our marriage. As I drove the 14 miles back to the dealership in the identical “Angiemobile” I noted that it was in a much tidier state than ours and that the mileage was substantially lower. These seemingly obvious things would not be as obvious to Angie as “she is very busy and has a lot of important things to do”. It seems that this day’s “important things “consisted of shuttling our children around, shopping, lunch, and reorganizing the perpetual state of the insanity in our home.
As usual, she was running late and one of her many friends had dropped her off at the dealership. She went to the receptionist and was told that her car was ready and the keys were in it in the service area. When she got into the car she noted “that it smelled funny”. She summoned the service rep. and asked him to smell her car. This request was received with a raised eyebrow and a long stare. He followed her out and sniffed.
” No, I don’t smell anything, but I just got over a cold, let me get another rep. over here” he said.
The second rep. thought he smelled a slight damp odor and summoned another rep. over. Soon there was a crowd of people sticking their heads in the car and sniffing. The conclusion was that someone must have shampooed the carpets and the odor was from that. This seemed to satisfy Angie and she headed for home. On the way she noted that the mileage was lower on the indicator and thought to herself
“I am going to have to call them when I get home and tell them someone was messing with our odometer!”
Of course she forgot this within several minutes.
I had a reception committee waiting when I arrived at the dealership. It consisted of a very large, angry looking woman surrounded by several very active children, and an irritated salesman. I waved at these people and smiled as I drove the car right past them and felt their hostile glares on the back of my head as I parked next to our vehicle. The difference was clear between the two SUV’s. Our car had backpacks, shoes, various pieces of abandoned clothing, discarded wrappers and papers, and a good coat of dirt and dust. I asked Angie about this and she replied that she thought they had cleaned it up for her. This is another example of the very different world that Angie lives in within her mind. The angry salesman greeted me with exasperation and asked
“What did you think you were doing?!”
I calmly replied that next time you leave a vehicle in the service bay and my wife is involved; don’t leave the keys in it. I smiled again at him and nodded at the angry lady with the hyperactive kids. The service rep that helped Angie came up and thanked me for bringing the vehicle back and I got in our car and left. Again I smiled and waved at the “offended parties” and received more glares. On my arrival at home Angie rushed out and opened the passenger door and smelled deeply.
“That’s my car!” she exclaimed and promptly went off to finish whatever it was she was doing as she was sure it was “very important.”