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Graduation

I am currently sitting in a large audience at the Bella Vista Class of 2018 graduation ceremony. They are calling each graduate to come up and receive their diploma. There are 432 graduates. This is going to take a while.

As I sit here it brings back my high school graduation. There wasn’t one. I was the class of 1974 and when they had their graduation I had already been out of school for two years. I was working at the hospital in Southern California taking people to surgery, back from recovery or down to the morgue, depending on how alert the doctor was.

The reason I never graduated with my class was because of when I was in the Witness Protection Program all my school records were mysteriously lost. The counselor called me in at the end of my first quarter of my junior year and told me that because of the missing records I would have to take summer school after my junior and senior years to earn the  credits needed. That was my last day of school.

Some might say that I was doomed to a low income standard because of my lack of a diploma. Not so. While it is commendable to get that diploma, it is not the thing that dictates your success in life. The type of person that you have allowed yourself to become, your influences around you and the way you look at life do.

But now I am thinking of all the sculls full of mush that are still filing up to receive their diplomas. The education system is severely flawed today. For the most part it is a result of the “politically correct” attitude in society.

When I went to school life was different and much better in my humble opinion. We had something that regrettably now is no longer practiced in the education system today.  It was called discipline.

The board of education was not a group of politically motivated individuals. It was a flat paddle the hung on the wall in the vice principle’s office. I was on a first name basis with that board. It was one of the motivational tools that helped me become a useful member of society.

I remember when Benjamin was not doing his work in the classroom in the third grade and the teacher brought it to our attention during a parent teacher conference. My response was a recommendation to flunk him and do the third grade over again. I reasoned that being the oldest kid in class might just be a good motivation to pay attention. My suggestion was met with shock and horror from the teacher. You would have thought I just pooped on her desk.

” We can’t do that! “ she exclaimed, “That would damage his self esteem!”

I asked her what was better for him? Feeling good about being an idiot or actually learning to be a useful person? This statement went over like asking for a baby seal steak at a dinner for PETA.  Angie of course was mortified by my totally reasonable statements. This subject is one of the few things we disagree about.

Several years ago I got a text from my nephew that his daughter was going to receive the “African American Acheivement Reward”. My nephew is the whitest guy I know. When he stands in he sun you need a pair of sunglasses to cut down on the bright reflection. His wife is black. She is not from Africa either. My nephew’s idea was to have the white side of the family attend. I thought it was brilliant. Unfortunately we were overruled by our wives. That is another reason why God made women more emotionally balanced than men.

I rejoice over the difference as it makes the world a safer place. Women think differently than men. Let me illustrate: Two guys driving in a pickup truck. The passenger tells the driver:

“Hey Bill, your shirt is on fire.”

“Oh, thanks” replies Bill as he pats the flames out with his free hand.

That’s it. The entire conversation is complete.

Now, if it was Jill and not Bill there would have been a lot of screaming involved and then a long discussion on how Jill felt about her blouse being on fire, where they were going to go to replace the blouse and what flavor of ice cream they will get afterwards to celebrate their new life’s journey.

Back to this graduation. The students have now all received their diplomas and the choir has sung a happy little tune of the class of 2018’s great achievements. The families are posing with the graduates and celebrating the day. Little do these students know but life, the real life, has just now begun.

One of the announcements during the ceremony was that 406 of the graduates are now heading off to college, 14 are heading into the armed services and only 8 are heading to jobs.

I have a problem with that ratio. I used to work at an off campus housing apartment complex as a maintenance man. While there were a few who where there to learn, a majority were there to party. The damage they caused kept me employed for a year. I would talk to the students when they were around and sober. I asked several what their major was. Some of them didn’t have one yet. These were Juniors in college!

I was talking to a plumber on a job site recently and he told me his manager held a degree in phycology. This, I am sure, was because the company wanted to find out what the plumbing is thinking or feels about being pipes used to supply water and remove toxic waste. Mustn’t have any unhappy pipes now must we?

I wonder how many McDonalds managers have a degree that cost their parents over a hundred thousand dollars? Something is wrong with this system. But then again, I’m only a high school drop out that ran a successful HVAC business for 30 years so what do I know?

To all the graduates I offer a hearty congratulations and the common sense advice that has kept me going. Work hard, be honest, show love for your fellow man and don’t forget to have a sense of humor, you’ll need it.

 

 

 

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